Shortcut to losing your intellectual virginity

We are providing some shortcuts for losing your intellectual virginity but first you must understand what it means to lose some of your intellectual virginity. Losing your intellectual virginity is not an all or nothing phenomenon. You lose it a little bit at a time and slowly, over time, it builds up on you like a crescendo until one day ... BOOM ... it hits you like a sexual orgasm. “OMG” you will exclaim. Why didn’t I see that before?


IQ Virgin

The shortcut to losing some of your intellectual virginity appears below. But first we must warn you. You cannot unlearn what we are going to show you. To lose some of your intellectual virginity you must read and understand the sentence below. We understand that it contains some sesquipedalian nomenclature because they are necessary to losing some of intellectual virginity.

He, lacking any metaphysical, epistemological, and existential apothogems, hebdomadally, and with anfructuosity, took an oculatory tour of her perambulating loveliness and serendipitously found his intestinal fortitude and, without absquatulating for having purchased the rope of Ocnus, punctuated his inamorata with osculatory favors for being his own personal mini-Hellen, even while knowing she would also suffer the fate of Acco.

We warned you. Reading this sentence will have done one of two things for most people. First, if you did not understand the sentence, you will have lost some of your intellectual virginity. Second, if you understood the sentence you will understand the following Socratic question about who is wiser: The person who thinks she knows but doesn’t know, or the person  who knows he doesn’t know?

For those who want an intellectual shortcut to discover what it is like to lose some of their intellectual virginity click here for a translation of the sentence above.